Do you believe that your fortunes in life are set in stone, that you are the way you are and that is that? some people are born confident, some appear calm and relaxed and some are very talented and it’s all down to the genes?

Research has discovered that although genetics play a part in your make up, a far bigger influencing factor is your environment.

The environment you grew up in determined what you were told about yourself, how you see and think about yourself and your capabilities. How you think about yourself was ‘programmed’ into you at an early age. From birth to around 7 years old the mind is open to suggestion and it is at this time where most of our beliefs about ourselves are formed and those beliefs determine your results in life – what you can and can’t do.  Some people believe (think) they are unconfident and as a result act this way. So, what is so different about a confident person, what makes them confident? The simple answer is how they THINK about themselves. They were most likely brought up to believe and trust in themselves and to think and talk to themselves in a positive way. This behaviour of positive thinking is at a subconscious level and it is why people struggle and fail when they use their conscious mind and will power to change their fortunes.

Around 94 – 98% of all your behaviour is automatic, it happens without you thinking about it, without your conscious awareness, it is subconscious. Once you have learned a task it is committed to your subconscious. You walk, drive, dress etc. without thinking about it.

If you think of losing weight, it seems straight forward – eat less and healthier and maybe add some exercise and the weight will drop off right? It seems simple, but why then do so many people fail? They may succeed for a while but ultimately fall back into old ways. This is because they haven’t changed how they think and feel about themselves at a subconscious level. They still have the same beliefs about themselves. How you see and feel about yourself dictates your behaviour. You can consciously override this for a short period of time through will power, but eventually your subconscious program will kick back in. 

Think of an automatic central heating system and the temperature being set at 25 deg. C. The system will maintain that temperature no matter what. If a door is left open and the temperature drops, the heating system will kick in and take the temperature back to 25 deg. C before shutting off. The heating system has been programmed to maintain the 25 deg. C temperature, just like your mind has been programmed to maintain your behaviour and results.

The good news is, you can change this programming and therefore your habits, behaviour and results. How do you do this?  Visualisation and repetition. 

Visualise yourself doing and being how you want to be and repeat, repeat and repeat. You imagine yourself the way you want to be until it takes root. It might seem difficult to begin with, after all you have many years of thinking of yourself negatively, but it will get easier. Visualisation is a powerful way of re-programming yourself and it is used by many successful people to improve their performance and self-image. 

Research shows that the mind cannot tell the difference between something vividly imagined and something real. Therefore, visualising an outcome will be more effective than simply saying it or wishing it. When you perform an act, neural pathways are being stimulated and the same physiological changes happen when you visualize yourself performing that act.

Use your imagination to see yourself being the way you want to be and get emotionally involved with the images - as if you were actually experiencing the act. 

Your subconscious mind accepts the images and thoughts that you repeatedly practice, and over time it will change your mindset accordingly. Do it for 90 days consecutively, without missing a day. This will create new neural pathways and new circuits in your brain.

Visualisation can be done at any time but can be more beneficial last thing at night or first thing in the morning, but you can practice it at any time.

It may not be as quick a fix as hypnotherapy and does require commitment, but remember, you have constantly programmed yourself negatively for years, so change will take time. As with most things in life, it requires practice and repetition.

And, if you encounter a setback, it doesn’t mean that you have failed and you must give up, it means you are human. We all encounter problems, it’s how we respond to them that counts.  Instead, notice all the little successes you are making and nurture them to even bigger successes. After all, it took time to learn to ride a bike and we had to fall off a few times along the way. 

I am happy to answer any questions or comments you may have.